07/29/10
When you and your spouse don’t particularly enjoy each other’s company, it can put major stress on not only your relationship, but everyone in the home. Becoming friends with your partner, though it won’t happen overnight, can greatly improve the way you interact with one another, bringing a rich, loving energy into your home.
Here are some tips to get you started toward developing a great friendship with your spouse:
- See your partner as your equal; marriage is better when it is perceived as a partnership. It will only hurt your relationship if you have to constantly tell your partner what needs to be done, so discuss responsibilities and share them as equally as possible to avoid build up of frustration and resentment.
- Marriage is not a competition; each of you brings your own unique talents and flaws to your marriage, so don’t compare yourselves to one another, enjoy each other’s special qualities and work together on minimizing your flaws.
- Remember the old adage: Treat others as you would want to be treated; in other words – be kind! Doing small favors for one another will go a particularly long way. And don’t be afraid to be the first one to do these little acts of kindness; your spouse will likely soon reciprocate, so it will soon be worth the effort you put forth.
- Speak nicely; try as much as possible to speak to each other in a loving tone. Avoiding hateful words is particularly important – they can’t be taken back and can seriously damage the faith you have in one another.
- Share your feelings, emotions, hopes and dreams; this type of sharing will create a very special closeness.
- Spend some time every week just being with each other; when you are physically separated, emotional detachment can set in. When you are home at the same time, don’t hang out away from each other on separate computers or watching different televisions. Have special date nights and spend some quality time together as often as you can manage it. Finding interests and activities you can share will enhance your friendship as well, so make this a priority as well.
When you are developing a strong friendship with your spouse, remember the golden rule and treat one another in ways that you would treat your best friend. Over time, your current relationship will grow into a special friendship that will bring contentedness and peace to your home.
